For a while blogging was and has been an outlet for me, tonight this is more of a forced than something which has been mauled over in the brain for days if not weeks on end. Maybe it has been just not in the way that my other topics have been, I've loved blogging and sharing my thoughts however lately it's something that's taken a backseat to life. I rarely sit down and find myself thinking, "Hey, that's something I should write about or this is a deep personal experience that others may find helpful." Now my brain is rapid fire, with quick thoughts so here's to slowing down a bit and writing more. It's always been therapeutic for me, I enjoy it probably more than I express.
It's now August 18th @ 10:13pm, just finished a most eloquent movie about the life of JRR Tolkien, the most engaging pieces were after the war and his experiences were something that connected me. I'm sitting here in my apartment thinking about the previous week and the coming week as it's late on Sunday, knowing what lies ahead this road will be a bit challenging for me and I do not know the outcome. It's a difficult road filled with unknowns and turns that are foreboding at times, but then there is this hope that allows for hope when all else fades. Like dawn creeping over the trees and hills after an ugly storm that destroys, uproots, and pillages communities. There is a hopefulness and it's not of my own making.
My heart is heavy. I am working on becoming a better version of me, but there's an unexpected turn that was taken a few months ago which has brought me into the most peculiar of circumstances in the very best of ways. I will not say more.
Writing, blogging, or journaling has been more therapeutic since my return to home, something which helped me to express emotions and feelings at times while not being tormented by them, call it emotional agility if you will. Our emotions are neither good nor bad, they are them, they offer insights into our world and as we project them we show others what is going on inside of us. Recently, there's been a pattern of returning to the basics in my life, by this being diligent in the little things and understanding the importance of the disciplines in work, life, faith, and even fishing along with my other hobbies.
So now I bid thee goodnight and I shall rise to go through the routine of life, to be diligent in the little things to honor the teachings and my God. To let go of the past, to move forward in life, and to take the next hill. There are battles to be won, then there are battles to lost, and battles which we were never meant to fight. Thank God we have one who intercedes on our behalf, gives us a grace that is not wimpy or cheapened, but one that is full life and forgiving. Remember God is in control, He is sovereign over all things. Hope, the desire and belief things will change. Hope. Such a simple word with massive implications. Thank you God who can do immeasurably more, who allows us to hope beyond hope.
Thank you friends, family, and loved ones for your support and encouragement throughout my life.
Goodnight and God Bless!
