As I was driving to class I noticed something considerably different in thought pattern along with my personality even. For me it started a long time ago and this has festered which has caused me a lot of pain in the past. I saw in the past because as of today the truth is in and the trash is out. As 1 Corinthains 5:17 says, " Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!"
I won't drag this out anymore then what it will be and what I want to talk about is the nuts and bolts of this. The lies that are believed that causes an identity theft and secondly the truths that as a christian guy needs to recognize and understand who we are in Christ.
This is a very deeply rooted issues because I've been dealing with it for most of my life and it's only gotten worse after coming back from Iraq. With the talk of an engagement amongst my friends it's made it even harder because I'm going through a hard time right now honestly. After 4 years being I'm just now starting to decompress in many ways that I never did before when I came home. Most of my issues I suppressed them with multiple different things what they are isn't a concern anymore, but after all this time I'm starting to deal with them. With the looming thought of being diagnosed with P.T.S.D., the baggage from Iraq and the fact of going off to war is all painful. In many ways this has been a good season, but it also makes life just overall tougher for me. The more I look deeper inside of myself the more I see the identity theft that has taken place. I know it won't be easy to rid myself of this, but it's the least I can do right now.
So I'll bring you up to where I was when I realized what this truly had become which was about an hour ago as I was driving to class it as I praying like a ton of bricks. I felt the pain in my heart, the tears begin to form, and the longing to be who I am and not something that I'm not. Gosh I hate talking about this stuff...... stuff that I wish I didn't have to deal with, stuff that hurts because I've believed it for far to long. But this is what I get to deal with. Funny thing is I've told plenty of others about the verses that have helped me, but have I truly believed what I've told others now I'm not so sure after today.
The truths are outlined clearly in the bible. That we are treasured, loved, and valued. God's love should be enough, but yet with our insecurities it doesn't always have the effect that it should. This isn't one of the topics that I like talking about, but it needs to come out because I can't keep it in anymore.
© Nathan Fahlin
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Friday, November 18, 2011
Being
Well I'm not really sure what the title is going to be for this one, but what I can tell you as with many of my blog they haven't been easy to write. As of matter of fact they have been flat out tough and so this one will be as well. What this post will consist of will be a variety of what's been happening recently.
Well where to start hmmm Wednesday seems like a good day to pick up and share with what's happening. The day consisted of going the V.A. (Veteran Affairs) for a follow up appointment from some testing that I did during the late summer/ early fall. As I figured out earlier in the fall that the test results were inconclusive therefore only leaving a small window for what I had been dealing with. The symptoms are as such: relentlessness, hyper vigilance, anxiety, and depression. Funny thing is they all point towards P.T.S.D. (post traumatic stress disorder) and I'm okay with that because after being told by the doctor that I'd seen over at the Superior, WI V.A. (Veteran Affairs) had told me that he thought I was adjusting fine, but I learned something when the topic of P.T.S.D. came back up again in October of this year. When I started making calls to them again I had found out that he had diagnosed me with an anxiety disorder yet never told me or scheduled any follow up appointments. When I learned that my frustration was beyond anything that I had experienced prior to that. Next it will be 4 weeks that I've been seeing a counselor at the local Vet Center and Monday next week marks the start of me seeing a Christian counselor which has been recommended to me by a close friend. So that's where I'm at right now, on the boundary of being diagnosed with the biggest stereotyped mental disorder among veterans returning from combat and I'm okay with that because it's finally being dealt with not being brushed under the rug so to speak.
This next topic is more then just a guy venting about stuff that's going on, it's a guy showing his struggles something that society doesn't like from men, but being a christian calls us to being real, to be in community with one another therefore talking about what's going on in our lives. I apologize right now because I don't know how anyone will react therefore this is kind of a disclaimer. Okay here it is. For a very long time as I grew up I was known as the quiet one, timid, and meek in a sense in some ways it was fine, but in other ways it hurt me more then it helped. The Nathan just about everyone sees today is a very changed person and I believe that's due to a large part of God and the military in regards in how I interact in social settings and friends. Monday my Dad brought up the subject of marriage which has been a constant conversation since this summer and fall. The pressure he puts on me I can handle to a degree, but the truth of the matter is he doesn't listen to anything I tell him. The second part to this is I'm good at being a friend, but right up until the part where you could start a relationship or whatever you want to call it. That's where my timidness comes out and that's where I struggle. That's when the nervousness and any other crap shows it's head. This is the other side of it too. When a woman in the years past takes a notice to me I haven't always had the best image of myself and a lot of times I would ask myself: "Why me ?" or "What does she see in me" and just recently I had a good friend share this with me and this is what he said, " Nathan, any women would be lucky to have you." I'm so grateful for his friendship and what's that meant to me. He's truly been an inspiration of what God can do through the struggles of life. I'm sure there is a ton of scripture that goes along with this, but right now my brain is on overload so this is what I'm gonna do which is call it finished and hope that people see me for who I am not just where I've been or what I've done because there is still a lot of living left to do for this Man of God.
© Nathan Fahlin
Well where to start hmmm Wednesday seems like a good day to pick up and share with what's happening. The day consisted of going the V.A. (Veteran Affairs) for a follow up appointment from some testing that I did during the late summer/ early fall. As I figured out earlier in the fall that the test results were inconclusive therefore only leaving a small window for what I had been dealing with. The symptoms are as such: relentlessness, hyper vigilance, anxiety, and depression. Funny thing is they all point towards P.T.S.D. (post traumatic stress disorder) and I'm okay with that because after being told by the doctor that I'd seen over at the Superior, WI V.A. (Veteran Affairs) had told me that he thought I was adjusting fine, but I learned something when the topic of P.T.S.D. came back up again in October of this year. When I started making calls to them again I had found out that he had diagnosed me with an anxiety disorder yet never told me or scheduled any follow up appointments. When I learned that my frustration was beyond anything that I had experienced prior to that. Next it will be 4 weeks that I've been seeing a counselor at the local Vet Center and Monday next week marks the start of me seeing a Christian counselor which has been recommended to me by a close friend. So that's where I'm at right now, on the boundary of being diagnosed with the biggest stereotyped mental disorder among veterans returning from combat and I'm okay with that because it's finally being dealt with not being brushed under the rug so to speak.
This next topic is more then just a guy venting about stuff that's going on, it's a guy showing his struggles something that society doesn't like from men, but being a christian calls us to being real, to be in community with one another therefore talking about what's going on in our lives. I apologize right now because I don't know how anyone will react therefore this is kind of a disclaimer. Okay here it is. For a very long time as I grew up I was known as the quiet one, timid, and meek in a sense in some ways it was fine, but in other ways it hurt me more then it helped. The Nathan just about everyone sees today is a very changed person and I believe that's due to a large part of God and the military in regards in how I interact in social settings and friends. Monday my Dad brought up the subject of marriage which has been a constant conversation since this summer and fall. The pressure he puts on me I can handle to a degree, but the truth of the matter is he doesn't listen to anything I tell him. The second part to this is I'm good at being a friend, but right up until the part where you could start a relationship or whatever you want to call it. That's where my timidness comes out and that's where I struggle. That's when the nervousness and any other crap shows it's head. This is the other side of it too. When a woman in the years past takes a notice to me I haven't always had the best image of myself and a lot of times I would ask myself: "Why me ?" or "What does she see in me" and just recently I had a good friend share this with me and this is what he said, " Nathan, any women would be lucky to have you." I'm so grateful for his friendship and what's that meant to me. He's truly been an inspiration of what God can do through the struggles of life. I'm sure there is a ton of scripture that goes along with this, but right now my brain is on overload so this is what I'm gonna do which is call it finished and hope that people see me for who I am not just where I've been or what I've done because there is still a lot of living left to do for this Man of God.
© Nathan Fahlin
Friday, November 4, 2011
Memories
Well as you can imagine with the title being what it is that you got an idea of what's going to be talked about. Here's the truth about something very real and I'm not sure how many people grasp this or even realize that it's there. I wouldn't change anything about what I did during my time in the military, wouldn't trade any of the memories, experiences, and trials.
As I begin to look back at my memories and some of the stuff that I went through I realized how much that's shaped and molded me in so many different ways. Just like life you take the good with the bad, but when you're in a combat zone the bad can seem to out weigh the good which can be very frustrating specifically if that's what you are looking for. Knowing that you served for some high purpose, made a difference somewhere, had an impact.
The past couple weeks have been filled with emotions and feelings that have not been around much along with memories that haven't been looked at in years for some nearly half a decade has gone by without that memory even been touched and now this memory is at the forefront of the thoughts all week long for me. As I was sitting in EMT class last night drawing out this picture of them memory I began to realize that there was no way I could hold on to this memory any longer. Surrender was the only option. I'm not sure how exactly to explain this piece of my memory, but here it is: I just been dropped off by the helicopter that had picked all three of us up after being wounded, before I could even get my bearings I was already on my way getting a Cat scan, after that I was promptly put on a medical bed. Next thing I remember was this medic coming over to me with this utter peace about her and a calmness that just washed over me like a wave of water hitting the rocks. She pulled off pieces of shrapnel off my face, washed the blood off, and bandaged the few wounds that I had. A few days later I was putting my buddies on a helicopter and they were on their way out of country. That night I was messing around on the computer when the same medic who had cleaned me up after being wounded, she found me and asked "How I was doing?" It probably didn't take her long to understand to see that I was pretty crappy. Here I was at a hospital with guys who were all sorts of messed, watching them come and go all day every day I was there just about. We sat down and started to talk, within minutes I'm completely crying my eyes out. This is moment I thought would never end, but it did I finally dried my eyes and went back to my rack (aka bed).
I never thought I'd share those memories with anyone honestly, not because people wouldn't understand, but how could they understand when they have never walked in my shoes......oh how wrong I was. I'm reminded of a song sung by Matthew West and the title is Strong Enough. It's talks about how we don't think we are strong enough to go through the current trials we are facing in our lives. Here's the absolute truth though God never gives us more then we can handle and when our strength starts to falter His strength prevails. There maybe pain in the night, but joy always comes in the morning. Take a look out your window right now and tell me what you are looking you can't find some kind of joy. For me it's simple, every morning I wake up is a blessing from God because as I've said many time I should of died in Iraq, but I'm here. Thank you all for your continued support, prayers and encouragement.
© Nathan Fahlin
As I begin to look back at my memories and some of the stuff that I went through I realized how much that's shaped and molded me in so many different ways. Just like life you take the good with the bad, but when you're in a combat zone the bad can seem to out weigh the good which can be very frustrating specifically if that's what you are looking for. Knowing that you served for some high purpose, made a difference somewhere, had an impact.
The past couple weeks have been filled with emotions and feelings that have not been around much along with memories that haven't been looked at in years for some nearly half a decade has gone by without that memory even been touched and now this memory is at the forefront of the thoughts all week long for me. As I was sitting in EMT class last night drawing out this picture of them memory I began to realize that there was no way I could hold on to this memory any longer. Surrender was the only option. I'm not sure how exactly to explain this piece of my memory, but here it is: I just been dropped off by the helicopter that had picked all three of us up after being wounded, before I could even get my bearings I was already on my way getting a Cat scan, after that I was promptly put on a medical bed. Next thing I remember was this medic coming over to me with this utter peace about her and a calmness that just washed over me like a wave of water hitting the rocks. She pulled off pieces of shrapnel off my face, washed the blood off, and bandaged the few wounds that I had. A few days later I was putting my buddies on a helicopter and they were on their way out of country. That night I was messing around on the computer when the same medic who had cleaned me up after being wounded, she found me and asked "How I was doing?" It probably didn't take her long to understand to see that I was pretty crappy. Here I was at a hospital with guys who were all sorts of messed, watching them come and go all day every day I was there just about. We sat down and started to talk, within minutes I'm completely crying my eyes out. This is moment I thought would never end, but it did I finally dried my eyes and went back to my rack (aka bed).
I never thought I'd share those memories with anyone honestly, not because people wouldn't understand, but how could they understand when they have never walked in my shoes......oh how wrong I was. I'm reminded of a song sung by Matthew West and the title is Strong Enough. It's talks about how we don't think we are strong enough to go through the current trials we are facing in our lives. Here's the absolute truth though God never gives us more then we can handle and when our strength starts to falter His strength prevails. There maybe pain in the night, but joy always comes in the morning. Take a look out your window right now and tell me what you are looking you can't find some kind of joy. For me it's simple, every morning I wake up is a blessing from God because as I've said many time I should of died in Iraq, but I'm here. Thank you all for your continued support, prayers and encouragement.
© Nathan Fahlin
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Healing and Restoration
There has been a lot of talk about healing and restoration in this age of Christianity that we live. I know some people that probably don't believe completely in healing and restoration, but let me share with you what's been going on with me and my life since I've came back to Christ along with coming home from Iraq after being wounded.
With war comes a lot of unseen wounds and some physical wounds as well. You see a lot when you're in a combat zone, death, life, and everything in between. When I returned home from Iraq there was and still is a lot of stuff that needs to be decompressed and let out. In the first coming months there wasn't really anything showing up in my life, but a few more months down the road the depression came out and it was bad. For about six months I did nothing, but eat, sleep, talk with my family, and play video games. Then about six months after being home I realized that I needed help and help bad because the path I was heading down wasn't good. In May of 2008 I put a call into my leadership and told him that things needed to change and change quick. That drill I started talking to a counselor which continued for about a year and a half. That fall I started back in school which brought in new friends, new contacts, and just another step forward in life. At this point I started going to church again and started down on that path again something that needed to happen to get my life back on track.
In 2009 my life really started to change in so many different way. One friend who really was my best friend for a good part of time started sharing with me the things I needed to change in me. That Christmas he asked me to the church I'm currently attending. That sermon I laughed more so then I had in a very long time. You might ask what would cause me to laugh and I'll share with you what it was. Youtube the movie "It's a wonderful Life" because this movie shows a lot of different parts, but the part that made me laugh was the seen when Mr. Bailey finds the money to save his bank, his home, and everything that he loves.
For me I knew in an instant that this is where I needed to be. Through the time that I've been at Anchor Point I've watched, listened, learned, and participated in many activities. I watched as God began his work in my life shaping me, molding me, and reforging me into the man He created me to be. There has been healing in many areas of my life where there had been nothing, but darkness for a long time, then there was light in my life again. The restoration has been very cool to watch because I can see it in the way I think, solve problems, communicate, and how I handle life. My life began to change slowly and steadily, bit by bit and piece by piece God began to put my life back together. Some people look at me kind of strange and others are "WOW!!!! Really ?!?!" when I tell the story of how things have began to change and how they are so very different now then what life was like for me when I first came versus what it is now.
God has done a marvelous work in my life and He continues to change me into what He wants me to be and I'm okay with that. It's not always easy, but then again when is life easy honestly. Life continues to get harder as we get older. I mean 18 it's college and by that time we have a car most of the time, then we need to figure out what to do with our lives, 21 we are able to drink which brings up a lot of risky situations, thinking about moving out, finding a job, finding a spouse. The more we grow older the more life gets harder which is the way it is honestly. It's a reality that sometimes I don't wanna acknowledge to be truthful, but it is. I hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as I have had typing this.
© Nathan Fahlin
With war comes a lot of unseen wounds and some physical wounds as well. You see a lot when you're in a combat zone, death, life, and everything in between. When I returned home from Iraq there was and still is a lot of stuff that needs to be decompressed and let out. In the first coming months there wasn't really anything showing up in my life, but a few more months down the road the depression came out and it was bad. For about six months I did nothing, but eat, sleep, talk with my family, and play video games. Then about six months after being home I realized that I needed help and help bad because the path I was heading down wasn't good. In May of 2008 I put a call into my leadership and told him that things needed to change and change quick. That drill I started talking to a counselor which continued for about a year and a half. That fall I started back in school which brought in new friends, new contacts, and just another step forward in life. At this point I started going to church again and started down on that path again something that needed to happen to get my life back on track.
In 2009 my life really started to change in so many different way. One friend who really was my best friend for a good part of time started sharing with me the things I needed to change in me. That Christmas he asked me to the church I'm currently attending. That sermon I laughed more so then I had in a very long time. You might ask what would cause me to laugh and I'll share with you what it was. Youtube the movie "It's a wonderful Life" because this movie shows a lot of different parts, but the part that made me laugh was the seen when Mr. Bailey finds the money to save his bank, his home, and everything that he loves.
For me I knew in an instant that this is where I needed to be. Through the time that I've been at Anchor Point I've watched, listened, learned, and participated in many activities. I watched as God began his work in my life shaping me, molding me, and reforging me into the man He created me to be. There has been healing in many areas of my life where there had been nothing, but darkness for a long time, then there was light in my life again. The restoration has been very cool to watch because I can see it in the way I think, solve problems, communicate, and how I handle life. My life began to change slowly and steadily, bit by bit and piece by piece God began to put my life back together. Some people look at me kind of strange and others are "WOW!!!! Really ?!?!" when I tell the story of how things have began to change and how they are so very different now then what life was like for me when I first came versus what it is now.
God has done a marvelous work in my life and He continues to change me into what He wants me to be and I'm okay with that. It's not always easy, but then again when is life easy honestly. Life continues to get harder as we get older. I mean 18 it's college and by that time we have a car most of the time, then we need to figure out what to do with our lives, 21 we are able to drink which brings up a lot of risky situations, thinking about moving out, finding a job, finding a spouse. The more we grow older the more life gets harder which is the way it is honestly. It's a reality that sometimes I don't wanna acknowledge to be truthful, but it is. I hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as I have had typing this.
© Nathan Fahlin
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Almost Dying
This topic hit me like a brick wall when I started doing some lifting this morning because of certain frustrations that come up from life. I never realized it nor even considered it a concern, but recently with stuff from my time in Iraq coming back I'm almost shocked that I hadn't truly acknowledged this as an issue.
Here's what's been going on. For close to half a decade I've had the thought that I should be dead no question about it. The night I was wounded by the I.E.D., I should of died and for some unforeseen reason God decided to save my life yet again. The first time you might ask was when He sent His son to die on the cross so that everyone of us may have eternal life. This thought has been subconscious and hardly even recognized by me at all. I can look back through my memories and a lot of the time when I talk about what I did in the military or Iraq that's usually one of the things that I talk about. That's this conversation shouldn't be happening, but it is.
Please don't ask me what God's plan is or what His intentions are because I really don't know. What I do know is this: I believe that there is some greater purpose to my life that God saw value in saving me and returning me home to the family that loves. I'm truly grateful of this time I have been given, but I'm struggling to accept such a mighty gift because the greatest gift one person can receive is life which was first given by God our Creator. Just about everyday I wake and have this thought that I shouldn't even be here, but I am so I guess now the question is: "What do I do with the time that's been given to me?" I think some people would say enjoy life, experience everything that life has to offer, have a wife and kids(which is oddly enough something that I do want lol!), or do whatever you think you would want to do.
This is the truth of the matter. I've come to the conclusion that I would rather do what God has set before me because I believe in this verse from the book of Ephesians chapter 2 verse 10: " For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." I believe this is another reason why that God spared my life on the day that which of I should of died. I do believe that there is more to this journey then what I've experienced already which means that there is a lot of living left to do.
I remember a quote from a sermon in which one of my pastors was talking about a friend that he lost to cancer if memory serves me correctly. As the pastor was dying he said this quote, " I've spent most of my years here preaching and doing my best to show on to live for Christ and now I'm going to show them how to die for Christ." The pastor had 6 months to live and I can't imagine what that must of been like. The part I want to focus on is where he talks about "living for Christ" which is a phrase that is to easily slung around. This phrase "living for Christ" means that we are living for a greater purpose then ourselves, a career that we want, and anything else that might be placed a head of living for Christ. I know, I know lots of people say this and few act it out, but I think what needs to happen is that people need to have a better understand of what it means to truly be a Christian honestly. If we look at these passages from Philippians 1:21 and Galatians 2:20 I think we might be able to get a good picture of what it possibly means "living for Christ."
Philippians 1:21 "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." What I believe this author is talking about is what people don't grasp in our modern day Christianity which is if we are to live as Followers of Christ, that we are to do everything to the glory of the one who saved us, who's blood was spilled on the cross, but it should of been our blood.
Galatians 2:20 "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." This verse makes in crystal clear that we are live for Christ if you ask me and that we are to live a live that is Christ like, we are to be transformed so that we look more like Jesus and less like ourselves.
So this is what I've realized in my own life and I know I have my own downfalls simply because I'm human and not perfect. I know I make mistakes, stumble, fall, and do everything else that we as humans do, but it's how you handle those situations that will help transform into the imagine of Christ. One thing that I have a problem with is telling people I'm a Christian, my actions should show it by the way I live my life, talk to friends, handle situations, and every other aspect of life. To me being a Christian should be an outward expression of what Christ has done for us. That we may live our lives for something greater then ourselves. Yes, there will trials, pains, and everything else that life and the devil can throw at us, but in those moments which is all the time we need to rely on God to get us through not ourselves. SOOOOOOOOOOO be transformed!
© Nathan Fahlin
Here's what's been going on. For close to half a decade I've had the thought that I should be dead no question about it. The night I was wounded by the I.E.D., I should of died and for some unforeseen reason God decided to save my life yet again. The first time you might ask was when He sent His son to die on the cross so that everyone of us may have eternal life. This thought has been subconscious and hardly even recognized by me at all. I can look back through my memories and a lot of the time when I talk about what I did in the military or Iraq that's usually one of the things that I talk about. That's this conversation shouldn't be happening, but it is.
Please don't ask me what God's plan is or what His intentions are because I really don't know. What I do know is this: I believe that there is some greater purpose to my life that God saw value in saving me and returning me home to the family that loves. I'm truly grateful of this time I have been given, but I'm struggling to accept such a mighty gift because the greatest gift one person can receive is life which was first given by God our Creator. Just about everyday I wake and have this thought that I shouldn't even be here, but I am so I guess now the question is: "What do I do with the time that's been given to me?" I think some people would say enjoy life, experience everything that life has to offer, have a wife and kids(which is oddly enough something that I do want lol!), or do whatever you think you would want to do.
This is the truth of the matter. I've come to the conclusion that I would rather do what God has set before me because I believe in this verse from the book of Ephesians chapter 2 verse 10: " For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." I believe this is another reason why that God spared my life on the day that which of I should of died. I do believe that there is more to this journey then what I've experienced already which means that there is a lot of living left to do.
I remember a quote from a sermon in which one of my pastors was talking about a friend that he lost to cancer if memory serves me correctly. As the pastor was dying he said this quote, " I've spent most of my years here preaching and doing my best to show on to live for Christ and now I'm going to show them how to die for Christ." The pastor had 6 months to live and I can't imagine what that must of been like. The part I want to focus on is where he talks about "living for Christ" which is a phrase that is to easily slung around. This phrase "living for Christ" means that we are living for a greater purpose then ourselves, a career that we want, and anything else that might be placed a head of living for Christ. I know, I know lots of people say this and few act it out, but I think what needs to happen is that people need to have a better understand of what it means to truly be a Christian honestly. If we look at these passages from Philippians 1:21 and Galatians 2:20 I think we might be able to get a good picture of what it possibly means "living for Christ."
Philippians 1:21 "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." What I believe this author is talking about is what people don't grasp in our modern day Christianity which is if we are to live as Followers of Christ, that we are to do everything to the glory of the one who saved us, who's blood was spilled on the cross, but it should of been our blood.
Galatians 2:20 "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." This verse makes in crystal clear that we are live for Christ if you ask me and that we are to live a live that is Christ like, we are to be transformed so that we look more like Jesus and less like ourselves.
So this is what I've realized in my own life and I know I have my own downfalls simply because I'm human and not perfect. I know I make mistakes, stumble, fall, and do everything else that we as humans do, but it's how you handle those situations that will help transform into the imagine of Christ. One thing that I have a problem with is telling people I'm a Christian, my actions should show it by the way I live my life, talk to friends, handle situations, and every other aspect of life. To me being a Christian should be an outward expression of what Christ has done for us. That we may live our lives for something greater then ourselves. Yes, there will trials, pains, and everything else that life and the devil can throw at us, but in those moments which is all the time we need to rely on God to get us through not ourselves. SOOOOOOOOOOO be transformed!
© Nathan Fahlin
Friday, October 7, 2011
Comments or lack there of
I would like to take this time to encourage the readers of my blog to leave comments more often simply because as of right now I have one comment on all my blog posts. Please do not be afraid to leave a comment and share your thoughts and opinions.
Those of you who are following my blog constantly I would like to take this time to ask for any feedback whether it's my writing style, punctuations, spelling or lack there of. I guess this is your time to give me any grips, complaints, and or complements.
Sincerly,
Nathan Fahlin
Those of you who are following my blog constantly I would like to take this time to ask for any feedback whether it's my writing style, punctuations, spelling or lack there of. I guess this is your time to give me any grips, complaints, and or complements.
Sincerly,
Nathan Fahlin
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Worth dying for
What a beautiful morning drive it was as I headed to church on this cool crisp fall morning. The leaves in full turn, the colors so bright with the trees standing still. I was thinking about this topic yesterday as I was severely bored out of my mind, the topic kind of goes along with what I was talking about in my last.
I know this might not be the most pleasant topic, but the truth is that we need to look at is this: Is what we are living for worth dying for ? Is the gospel worth dying for ? Is Christ worth dying for ? This is something that I want to talk about more because the truth is that I hadn't thought much about this topic at all before this summer. As I read through Radical this summer with my mentor I came to realize that was the gospel worth living for? Was Christ really worth dying ? The decision came pretty quick for me with the answer a resounding "YES."
It was easy for me simply put and I'll explain it as best I can. By now most of you know that I served in the military and was in Iraq where there I almost died a couple of times. The more I thought about the topic "Is the Gospel worth dying for ?", the more I realized the answer in my heart. I'll explain it like this at the age of 19 I signed a piece of paper saying that I would serve my country and if necessary I would give my life in service to her. If I was willing to die for my country something that I truly love and believe in then was I willing to die for the Gospel the question came out as.
By the time I was 23 I had experienced more then some people will in their entire lives who live in our great country. I had lost a friend, experienced first hand what an I.E.D. (improvised explosive device) can do to a person, and by the time I came home the amount of change that had happened was huge. I was in 2009 that I realized that I had been living for myself and I just wasn't going to have any of it anymore. By 2010 I had been attending Anchor Point for about 6 months or so and that when I really realized that there was way more to life then what I was living for. This is when I really saw God working in my life, I began a transformation that I wasn't really sure was possible. Then this summer I read Radical which opened me up more and to the concept that I needed to understand that if I was so willing to die for my country then the Gospel and Christ were worth dying for. The truth that I grabbed on to was that this isn't just life changing, it's eternal changing which means it has an impact of epic proportions in a sense it changes a persons stars. The hard thing for me is that I'm a soldier, a protector through and through which means it's hard for me to surrender. Which means if God asked me to lay down my life and be that martyr, I would struggle with that because I don't like going down without a fight. I know this is God's fight, not mine, but the truth is that I would rather go down swinging then on my knees. I sure hope he understands that and I'm sure he does. Yeah I know sad and depressing ending right, but it's the truth that we need to come to realize and understand.
So what is the Gospel worth to you ? Is Christ really worth it ? I have my answers, but now I challenge you to look at your heart and ask the questions to you. I have my answers and I can't answer any bodies questions. We all have to ask ourselves and look at our own heart and ask the tough questions. It's a heart check to see where we really are. Truth is that there are few of us that God may ask to lay down our life for the cause of the Gospel.
© Nathan Fahlin
I know this might not be the most pleasant topic, but the truth is that we need to look at is this: Is what we are living for worth dying for ? Is the gospel worth dying for ? Is Christ worth dying for ? This is something that I want to talk about more because the truth is that I hadn't thought much about this topic at all before this summer. As I read through Radical this summer with my mentor I came to realize that was the gospel worth living for? Was Christ really worth dying ? The decision came pretty quick for me with the answer a resounding "YES."
It was easy for me simply put and I'll explain it as best I can. By now most of you know that I served in the military and was in Iraq where there I almost died a couple of times. The more I thought about the topic "Is the Gospel worth dying for ?", the more I realized the answer in my heart. I'll explain it like this at the age of 19 I signed a piece of paper saying that I would serve my country and if necessary I would give my life in service to her. If I was willing to die for my country something that I truly love and believe in then was I willing to die for the Gospel the question came out as.
By the time I was 23 I had experienced more then some people will in their entire lives who live in our great country. I had lost a friend, experienced first hand what an I.E.D. (improvised explosive device) can do to a person, and by the time I came home the amount of change that had happened was huge. I was in 2009 that I realized that I had been living for myself and I just wasn't going to have any of it anymore. By 2010 I had been attending Anchor Point for about 6 months or so and that when I really realized that there was way more to life then what I was living for. This is when I really saw God working in my life, I began a transformation that I wasn't really sure was possible. Then this summer I read Radical which opened me up more and to the concept that I needed to understand that if I was so willing to die for my country then the Gospel and Christ were worth dying for. The truth that I grabbed on to was that this isn't just life changing, it's eternal changing which means it has an impact of epic proportions in a sense it changes a persons stars. The hard thing for me is that I'm a soldier, a protector through and through which means it's hard for me to surrender. Which means if God asked me to lay down my life and be that martyr, I would struggle with that because I don't like going down without a fight. I know this is God's fight, not mine, but the truth is that I would rather go down swinging then on my knees. I sure hope he understands that and I'm sure he does. Yeah I know sad and depressing ending right, but it's the truth that we need to come to realize and understand.
So what is the Gospel worth to you ? Is Christ really worth it ? I have my answers, but now I challenge you to look at your heart and ask the questions to you. I have my answers and I can't answer any bodies questions. We all have to ask ourselves and look at our own heart and ask the tough questions. It's a heart check to see where we really are. Truth is that there are few of us that God may ask to lay down our life for the cause of the Gospel.
© Nathan Fahlin
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